Hello from Tel Aviv!

Hey friends!

It's been a long time since I've blogged. Mostly because I have been busy, also because keeping up with this blog isn't on the top of my priorities (sorry)!

Seminary has been an amazing experience so far. I've done things I've never thought I would - like learn Hebrew and travel to Israel. I ended the year in a completely different place than I thought I would. For my field studies, I am going to spend next year as the seminary assistant at Lincoln Park Presbyterian Church (LPPC for short). I sort of still can't believe that I'm going to be there. I thought that I needed a break from working in a church. Working at Fourth was an incredible experience. I know without the things I learned and the experiences that I had there, I wouldn't be who I am today. I definitely wouldn't be in Israel right now, I can say that for sure. But it wasn't a perfect experience. Though I enjoyed my time there, I almost think I learned more of what I don't want, rather than what I do. Fourth is an incredibly large church that does its best to help those less fortunate in the city of Chicago. Yet I never really felt welcomed there. On my very last day, someone asked me what I was doing in the basement kitchen, as if I was some random person off the streets who didn't belong.

Yeah.

I don't want to harp on and on about my problems with Fourth, because like I said, I did have a good experience overall and learned an incredible number of things. But I wanted a break. I wanted to be able to attend church again. I like church. It's good for the soul. But working during the morning services meant I either spent all day at the church so that I could attend the 4:00 service, or I just had to go without time at church. I frequently chose the latter, which eventually wore me down.

Since I came in to seminary pretty sure that I didn't want to be your average white-steeple pastor, I thought that I might want to do the dual-degree program with the University of Chicago's School of Social Work. I quickly came to the conclusion that I didn't actually want to do that, but unfortunately missed the deadline to apply for field studies. It's a long story, but I basically thought that I wanted to have my field site be a non-profit organization. During the process of picking one, Lincoln Park's seminary intern decided to change her degree program, so they were left without one. LPPC is a church that has a long history of having a seminary intern from McCormick. They also are an extremely small congregation with about 90 members, who seem to be very social justice-minded. Either way, I think that this will turn out to be a very interesting experience!

I don't know if any of you have been to Tel Aviv, but its basically the Miami of the Mediterranean. The flight was relatively uneventful. There was a problem with the entertainment system, so we were delayed for an hour (on the plane) while they tried to fix it. There were still issues during the flight, so there is some sort of gift we are going to get. Not sure what it is yet. I was super busy leading up to my departure, so I hadn't had much sleep. Which is good because I slept on the plane.

Customs/border control was easy peasy. Having an American passport makes life so much easier. Definitely a blessing that I regularly forget. No stamp in the passport which was a little disappointing. Instead they gave me a card. I can stay here for 3 months. Don't worry. I'm not going to. :)

I had planned on taking a train and bus to my hostel, but I felt tired and lazy when I finally got out of the airport and took a taxi. Probably not the best use of my funds, but it was worth the convenience. 

My flight got in at 10:30am and I arrived at the hostel by about 12:00pm. Couldn't check in, so I just chilled in the lobby area. It's a smaller hostel, and it seems like everyone is really friendly. At least with each other. No one really spoke to me which I was fine with because I was so tired! After I checked in, I went to the beach for about an hour. The beach was totally packed full of people! I had a lovely conversation with an Israeli man who asked me to be his American girlfriend. I politely declined. 

Back to the hotel for a shower and a nap. Exhaustion is the name of the game, people! I wasn't really hungry (and everything is essentially closed after 4pm on Fridays because of Shabbat) so I decided to take a walk along the beach. There is a marina and I was going to take some pictures. Instead I ended up having to fend off another very eager Israeli suitor. "No I don't want to be your girlfriend. No I don't want to kiss you. Thanks but see ya never." (That's how the conversation went in my head. I think I was nicer in person.) After that, I decided to head back to the hostel for the evening. It was getting dark and since I am alone (and clearly a target for creepy men) I didn't want to spend anymore time outside. I brought some granola bars with me, and ended up eating one of those for dinner. I did some research to figure out a game plan for today (Saturday). 

 Traveling alone is never as much fun as traveling with people, but all in all, I've had a pretty good time! Tomorrow I meet up with 2 other people heading over to the kibbutz where we will be staying for the dig. Still haven't heard back from them about where we are meeting, but hopefully will soon! I'll post pictures eventually. I took some today. Fair warning - most of them are of the beach because that's where I've been spending most of my time. 

A Bare Tree

Today is Valentine's Day & yesterday was Ash Wednesday, which might play into the theme of today's blog post. It also might have nothing to do with it. That is not really up to me to decide.

During the McCormick Ash Wednesday worship service yesterday, I had an interesting thought/insight/realization. During the service, I spent most of my time looking out the window. I was listening to the sermon & songs, but a lot of my attention was spent looking at a tree outside. It might be a strange thing to write, but I feel like this tree.

This tree might not seem special in any way. But today this tree struck me as special, because I saw myself in this tree. By looking at the tree, you wouldn't assume that anything is wrong with it. It's just winter, so there aren't any leaves. There's nothing wrong with this tree- the branches are sturdy. The tree is healthy and I'm sure it's roots run deep. And yet, it is bare.

That's how I feel lately. People ask me how I'm doing and I don't have anything to say. Yes, I am busy with classes and work. But so is everyone else. I feel just like that tree. I'm still there. I am still me. The main parts of me are there and nothing is wrong or broken. But I feel bare. Like I don't have any leaves. That there is nothing about me right now that distinguishes me from the bare tree next to me. I don't feel empty; I don't feel full. I am not sad and I'm not overly cheerful. I am not without work nor am I too busy to take breaks. I'm in a nebulous half existence.

I am waiting for Spring. But when will this season end? When will my leaves come back?

The View From Reception

I know that I haven't written a blog post in quite a while. I fully intended to finish the 5 that I half wrote during the Fall Semester, but life got in the way. I had a wonderful first semester. There were definitely some ups [meeting new friends, taking classes that are completely new to me & being chosen by my class as a Deacon] & downs [navigating the balance between a social life, school & 2 jobs]. But this has been an incredible growing and learning experience for me as I continue to discern God's call for me. Thank you so much for your support during my YAV year & my first year of seminary. I am going to try and make more time in my schedule to blog during the future months. 

I have a lot of things I should be doing right now. I have a devotion due at the end of the day today that is barely written. I have a Candidate Statement to write for my University of Chicago School of Social Service Administration application. I should be reviewing Hebrew vocab so I don't forget all of it. Yet, I feel compelled to write a blog post. Because, I really do witness the most incredible things working at the reception desk at McCormick.

Last semester one of our professors left her purse at the Starbucks down the street from the school. Not her wallet, her entire purse. I guess she put it down & forgot it? That detail isn't really important. In the afternoon, someone from Starbucks came by and asked to see speak with her. She didn't even realize that her purse was missing until I called her to come down to the lobby. Nothing was missing from her purse or wallet and the man, who turned out to be the owner of this particular franchise, refused to take a tip. He simply stated that he was doing the right thing.

A few minutes ago, a man came running in through the front doors. I thought maybe he was late for a meeting and needed a parking pass. Instead he told me that one of the cars in the lot had it's lights on. He not only went up to the 3rd floor to tell the Doctoral students, but he came back down with the student's keys to turn off the lights. He then brought the keys back to the classroom and left. I haven't seen an act of kindness like that in a long time.

Earlier this morning, I got a phone call from an alum of McCormick. We are having a book discussion on Monday based on Michelle Alexander's book, The New Jim Crow: Mass Incarceration in the Age of Colorblindness. This man was calling to see if we were going to be selling copies of the book at the event. Instead of just letting me transfer him to the appropriate person, he insisted that I take down his information, find out, and call him back. Normally I do everything I can in these situations to not take messages. I don't see most faculty or staff on a regular basis, and I don't want the messages to get lost. Normally I end up just emailing them. However, on this particular occasion, I agreed. When I found the answer to his question & called him back, he then proceeded to ask me how much it was at Barnes & Noble. My frustration level with this conversation was through the roof at this point. I'm not his personal secretary. Why can't he just look it up himself? Then he had me looking at the closest locations to where he lives. This phone conversation was getting ridiculous. I could have very easily been rude to him on the phone or just passed the message along to someone else. But that's not what happened. Instead, I made a new friend and we are going to meet on Monday to discuss the book. During this ridiculous phone conversation, I learned where he was from, the story behind his name, the fact that he is disabled, and much more. As I was trying my hardest to end the conversation before he talked to me into buying it for him and bringing it to his house, I realized something. God was working though me.

On the very last day of finals for the Fall Semester, I was working & trying to finish my paper for History. Of course, I had procrastinated and assumed that I would be able to devote time while working at the desk. What I didn't know was that the Staff Christmas Party was also the same day, taking place (for some unknown reason) in the lobby. So there was to be a party happening 5 feet from me while I tried to finish my research paper on The Acts of Paul and Thecla. I was not a happy camper. Someone that I work with noticed that I was upset. She found another student worker who was done with finals to cover the desk, while I moved to a quieter area of the building.

These events are not scarce at McCormick, and that is one of the reasons I love it here so much! Everyone that is a part of the greater McCormick community is devoted to helping others. The level of competition that is so rampant in other parts of the world seems to be absent. Professors understand that life happens (mostly) outside the classroom. Students are not competing against each other for the top of the class. Ruthlessness is not a virtue here.

Unfortunately every day is not like this. I have days when no matter what happens, I can't seem to find God at work. I have times when my classmates frustrate me & I wonder why I am here. I have days when everyone who calls the McCormick phone is rude and demanding. But today is not one of those days. And I hope that today is not one of those days for you either. Sometimes it takes a little work, but I hope that you can find God working somewhere in your home, school, workplace or community today. 

First Impressions: Seminary

Sometimes I still can't believe that I'm in seminary. These past few weeks haven't felt real. I don't really know how to describe it. I've never been in classes before that opened with prayer and the professors actually wanted to hear our opinions & thoughts. When I was in undergrad at Trinity, I felt like the professors just asked us questions to make sure that we had done the readings. Granted- when the subject one studies is accounting, there really isn't much room for interpretation and opinion. That's how companies end up with fraudulent accounting and suspect business practices.

I am currently enrolled in 4 classes: Pilgrimage in Faithfulness (PIF), Intro to Biblical Studies, History Survey 1 and Sexual & Domestic Violence. PIF is a course that all entering first-year seminarians are required to take. We are going to discuss subjects like baptism, communion, etc. From my understanding, the course is designed to not only orient us with the other opinions and viewpoints that our classmates bring, but to also make us evaluate what we ourselves believe. Intro to Biblical Studies is just that...and introductory course to studying the Bible from an academic lens. This is not the most exciting of courses, but I know that it is going to be invaluable for me since I only took 2 "religion" courses in college: Old Testament and World Religions. Neither of which taught me how to write an exegetical paper (a critical study and evaluation of biblical text). History Survey 1 is the first of 2 required Christian history classes that I need to take. So far it has been fun to learn about the early Christians!

Sexual & Domestic Violence (SDV) is my "fun" course for the semester. I think the best advice I received from my advisor & other McCormick students was to register for a course that I actually wanted to take vs a course that is required. Instead of Greek, I chose to register for SDV. For those of you who don't know, I took a course on international human trafficking when I studied abroad in Copenhagen. Although the class material was upsetting and disturbing, the information I learned is invaluable. These things (human trafficking & sexual and domestic violence) happen and extremely prevalent in our society. When they are not discussed, the issues do not go away. Instead we are just ignorant to them and people around us get hurt. I know I have more to say on this topic, but that is a different post for another day. For now, I'll just say this: sexual and domestic violence happens to people across political lines, sexual orientation, ethnicity, economic status, religious beliefs, and education. The victims of domestic violence should never be blamed. Men are not the dominant partner in the typical heterosexual marriage and clergy should never tell someone to put their marriage before their own personal safety or the well being of a child.

On a more positive note, I love living in Hyde Park. I actually feel at home here. Lately I came to the realization that if I do not feel at home somewhere, it is hard for me to adjust and enjoy new experiences. That was one of my biggest roadblocks to overcome while at Trinity. I lived in San Antonio for 4 years, but I never grew to think of it as home. Likewise, even though I lived in my YAV house for an entire year, it was never a place that I felt comfortable, relaxed and safe. Unfortunately, these times in my life were also times of immense personal growth. It was an emotional and spiritual struggle that was only increased by my feeling of displacement. I am so thankful that McCormick is an open, welcoming, and affirming community. I have already made some great friends and I am looking forward to the next 3 years with a positive & optimistic outlook. I am excited to learn and discern God's call alongside these amazing people! 

Friday Favorites: Week 2

This has been a busy week! I started off the week in San Diego, CA visiting Rebecca. She is awesome and I had a really great time. We went to the beach, which was awesome because my ideal vacation revolves around spending time at the beach. While we were there, we saw the biggest waves! Ok, they were probably only 6-8 feet tall, but I have never been in the ocean with waves that large. It was a really interesting/terrifying experience. Rebecca and I also watched all of Downton Abbey: Season 2 when I was visiting. It was awesome. :) And we went to the Titanic exhibit at the San Diego Natural History Museum. It was a lot of fun--especially if you enjoy looking at old things that have been eroded way under the ocean for 100 years. Balboa Park is one of those iconic San Diego landmarks (think Air & Space Museum, the San Diego Zoo, etc). I love visiting the park even for a short while.

I have done quite a lot of packing/cleaning/purging of my room the past few days. That was one of the reasons for the trip home. However, it has been really weird going through all of my old things! I came across a lot of old trinkets that reminded me of middle school, TAMS, high school & the first 2 years of college that I seem to have forgotten in my old age. It was both nostalgic and therapeutic to clean it all.

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Favorite Charity: Locks of Love

They estimate that 80% of their donations come from kids wanting to help other kids with cancer.

photo credit: locksoflove.org

Favorite Pin (one I am most likely to actually do...): Pineapple plant!

photo credit:  http://modcloth.tumblr.com

Favorite Thing I'm looking forward to in Chicago: The Doughnut Vault 

This place is THE BEST! Seriously...you need to go here ASAP. I don't care if you don't live in Chicago. They have specials every week--the birthday cake one is my favorite!

photo credit: thedoughnutvault.tumblr.com

Favorite Late Night Snack: Pistachio Almond Bluebell Ice Cream

photo credit:  http://bluebellreview.blogspot.com/

Favorite Candle: Frosted Cupcake from Slatkin & Co

Oh.my.gosh. This candle is my favorite, and it is currently on sale on the website. I hope you all know that I am showing extreme financial restraint for not buying any!!

photo credit: bathandbodyworks.com

Favorite TV Show: Downton Abbey

 I don't even know where to begin. This show enthralls me. I love the characters, plot and set. The scenery is amazing. I go in to a weird trance when I watch this show and don't want to do anything else. If you haven't already seen this show, you need to stop what you are doing and watch it. Season 1 is available on Netflix & I know that Season 2 in on Amazon Prime. Both of these things have 30-day trials...which is plenty of time for you to watch both!

photo credit:  http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/masterpiece/downtonabbey/season2.html 

Favorite BBQ Joint: Hammond's BBQ

If you live anywhere near Glen Rose, TX then you need to check out Hammond's!

Favorite Picture: From Rebecca & Alex's wedding

photo credit: the amazing Janalyn from 8twenty8 Studios